Let’s talk about families. There are so many types of families, some happy go lucky and some drama filled. Some seem happy go lucky, until you start planning your dream wedding, then everyone wants to tell you what you should do. They may even turn into a drama filled family that you don’t even recognize. A two headed monster comes to mind.
How you respond will set the tone for the next several months of planning. Are you going to yell, cry, let them take over? I surely hope not! Polite and firm I feel works best. Everyone wants to be included, and valued as a part of your Dream Team. Here are some great responses:
- That’s a great idea, but I really envisioned _____________.
- I didn’t think of that, I’ll have to mull it over.
- Thanks for brainstorming with me, I appreciate your input.
Here are a couple of things that always seem to cause trouble. Kids or no kids, & the dreaded seating chart. Just last week I was setting up linens and chair covers for a wonderful couple, whose family drama was getting to them. It was the day before the wedding and the Groom’s mother called him to interrogate him about why they were not having children at the wedding. Really? The day before… any ways he was telling her that they didn’t want children around the drinking, they didn’t want crying babies to interrupt the ceremony. Meanwhile, I was helping the bride with her centerpieces, and she was upset with the soon to be Mother in-law. “Can you believe she’s calling the day before the wedding?” “Yeah like I can just add to the guest count the day before.” “So and so said if their child couldn’t come, then they weren’t coming.” The bride was so flustered, I told her to take a deep breath and not to let these people ruin her excitement. Mind you these were adults she was dealing with, sounded more like 2 year olds throwing a tantrum to get their way.
Being in the wedding biz for 25 years, the biggest problem the brides talk to me about is the seating arrangements. Listen people, if you can not be cordial for a hour to have a meal with some one who might not be your favorite person in the world, then perhaps you should not be attending these type of events. Seriously, you are there to celebrate the union of 2 people you know and love. It’s not about you and who you will be dining with!
My advice is not to share to much information with your family. When the invitation says Adult Reception, they will know your wishes, and it’s too late to badger you into something. Just do your seating chart with your fiancé, the 2 of you should know your families well enough to decide who sits together.
Bottom Line: It’s Your Wedding Day! Don’t let drama keep you from enjoying the planning process.